http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml EdbE in Guyana, South America: Anong balita? Tue, 04 Mar 2008 19:20:39 -0600 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/b37bf70c233cd909221585ca1e937443_47cbfff6.writeback Mon, 03 Mar 2008 07:41:10 -0600 PAUWI NA. Matagal din bago nakakuha ng inspirasyon para magsulat. Naging abala din sa pagdalaw at pamamaalam sa mga pamayanan sa kailugan. Puno ang aking puso ng galak at pagmamahal sa lahat ng mga handog ng pagkilala, pasasalamat, at papuri. Tatlong taon din ang paglilingkod na ito na maraming kapalit. Yan ang totoo. Sa aking tantiya, mas marami akong nakuha kaysa sa naibigay. Uuwi akong mayaman sa karanasan at pagkilala sa sarili, simbahan at Diyos.///// KUWARESMA. Talikdan ang sala, at sa ebanghelyo sumampalataya. Nabatid ko sa pagbabasa na ang Kuwaresma ay halaw sa salita na ang ibig sabihin ay SPRING. Ito ang panahon ng bagong buhay mula sa panahon ng kamatayan dahil sa niyebe (snow). Ito ang paanyaya ng Kuwaresma, magkaroon ng bagong buhay. At dalawa ang yugto ng paanyaya, PAGBITAW at PAGKAPIT. Bumitaw sa anumang hadlang sa Kalooban ng Diyos at kumapit sa Kanyang Kalooban. Ito ang magbibigay ng bagong buhay.///// TRANSFIGURE. Kung susuriing maigi, hindi naman talaga si Hesus ang nagbago sa Bundok ng Tabor. Ang paningin o pananaw ng mga alagad ang nabago. Si Hesus ang Alpha at Omega, Diyos noon, ngayon at magpasa walang hanggan. Nabago din ang kanilang puso kasi nga ay nakita nila ang totoo. Ito ang aral ng misyon sa akin. Sa katunayan ang pagkapari, simbahan at Diyos ay ganito na noon pa subalit kinailangan ng misyon para mabuksan ang aking mga mata at mabago ang aking pananaw, kasama na ang puso. Ang misyon ang Bundok ng Tabor. //// Marami sa atin ay nakaranas na ng ganito. Ang iba ay sa Marriage Encounter, Life in the Spirit Seminar, 30-day retreat, etc. Ganoon na talaga ang Marriage, Espiritu Santo, All-loving God etc., pero di pa lang nabubuksan ang ating mga mata. Ika nga, pikit tayong nabubuhay. O bulag sa nandito o nandyan ng katotohanan. Tulad ng mga alagad mababago ang puso kung mababago ang pananaw. Ayon kay Mike Murdock, "Everything you need is already in your life, merely awaiting your recognition of it. Anything unrecognized remains uncelebrated by you. Anything you refuse to celebrate eventually exits your life. Don't miss that chance.///// NAKIKINIG AT NAGMAMASID PALA. Nasaling ang puso ko sa ginawa kong powerpoint summary ng missions. Naiyak ako sa sarili kong gawa nang mapanood ko ito nang buo kasama ang mga Lay Ministers. Nabatid ko na ang aking pinapanood ay mga alaala na lamang, larawan ng lumipas.. di na mauulit. Natanto ko na ang mga taong kapiling ko sa misyon ay magiging "noon," at marahil ay di na makakasama muli. Kasama na roon ang mga ilog, dagat, manok, halaman, sariwang hangin, walang kuryente atbp. Hindi ako makapagsalita, kaya't lumabas muna ako para tipunin ang sarili.///// Marami sa mga pamayanan na naghandog ng palatuntunan at piging makatapos ang misa ay nagpahayag ng pagkilala sa inyong abang lingkod. Pakiramdam ko talaga pinaka-pogi at pinaka- mahusay na akong misyonero sa mga sinambit nila!! (hahahah) Pero isa ang napatunayan ko, nakikinig sila sa homiliya! Inulit nila ang ilan sa mga nakasaling sa kanila. Hindi lang yun, nagmamasid din sila ng kilos, salita, pakikitungo (cf www.mspguyana.zoomshare.com/blog)///// PINOY POWER. Pag-alis ko sa Northwest, nanatili ako sa Georgetown para makapapag-paalam din sa mga kaibigan at sa Obispo. Naghanda rin ng tanghalian ang mga Kabataan. Pero napakaraming inihanda ng mga Pinoy para sa Despedida sa bahay nila Joel-Arlene. Naulit pa muli ang Despedida kasi hinintay ko pa si kabayang Rene na magsasama sa akin sa Suriname (a.k.a. Dutch Guyana). Talagang may Pilipinas sa Guyana: karaoke, inuman, madjong, kainan, kantiyawan, sayawan., higit sa lahat DAMAYAN. Kapag merong may sakit, kailangan ng matutuluyan o kontak, text o tawag lang, parang magkakapatid. Nagtulungan din kami para sa mga Pinoy na napagsarhan ng kumpanya, at inipit ang passports nila. Maayos na sila ngayon sa tulong din ng Embahada sa Brazil. Sa kasalukuyan, nandito ako sa Suriname. Nagmisa ako sa mga Pilipino na nagtatatrabaho sa Caterpillar at sa Fishing Company sa bahay ng isang Pinoy na Duktor. Ayun kay Dr. Abulos, sa 37 taon nila dito, ito ang kauna-unahang misa ng mga Pinoy sa Suriname(LIMASAWA pa ang dating!) Bahagi pa tayo ng kasaysayan, o di ba? /////3March2008 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/bbd56abe13ba5eb43aa260630cce764e_47a746c6.writeback Mon, 04 Feb 2008 11:09:26 -0600 ORDINARY TIME. After all the festivities of Advent, Christmas, Epiphany etc., the Church invites us to live what we have celebrated in the ordinariness of our lives. The Wise Men "manifested" this to us when we read in the Epiphany gospel: "...and they returned to their own country by a different way." (Mt2:12) Paying homage to the King didn't end with gold, frankincense and myrrh. They could not live the same way as before anymore. They change their ways after the encounter. We too are called to "Arise and Shine out!" (Is60:1) We cannot live as if we are still in darkness, pretending that Christ has not been born and has no effect in our lives. We to move (arise) and show (shine) this light that we have received and make a difference in our ways. We cannot just be the same if we have the light. We cannot just give our gifts (share what we have) but be gifts (give who we are) for others. After all saints are ordinary people who gave themselves more after receiving the light. And they become Patrons of different ordinary walks of life: Carpenters (Joseph), Fishermen (Andrew), Farmers (Isidore), Parents (Joachim & Ann) and so on... You don't have to do great things to shine. In the ordinary, you can make a difference. ///// BEATITUDES. Just as Moses gave the 10 commandments to the chosen people from Mt. Sinai, Jesus (the New Moses) gave the 8 beatitudes to the chosen disciples from a hill. Both are commandments in a way. Both are attitudes in a way. Christians have to act in a certain way different from the rest (Cf. above). We follow commands and must have certain attitudes. We can find happiness even in the difficult and testing situations we find ourselves in if we have the right attitude. The Beatitudes are counter- cultural if not counter-reality. We don't associate happiness with poverty, hunger, mourning, abuse, persecution and calumny. These tough situations can only find "happiness" in the reason or the cause. I feel happy though hungry after visiting the river villages. I am happy in the "poverty" of missionary life. As I've written before, happiness is about who you are not in what you have. ///// A priest was very happy and thankful after robbers took away all his wallet and wristwatch. People asked him, "Why are you still thankful? You must be cursing them!" The priest replied, "I am happy and thankful that I am not the robber." The pure of heart can see God (6th beatitude) even in the negative intricacies of life. Again, attitude makes the difference. ///// ENGAGED TO BE MARRIED? I started to bid goodbye to the riverain villages for my eventual departure in the Northwest. I sat foot in the Northwest 21Sept2005. I'll be leaving on 15Feb2008. I arrived on Martial law (Phils, 1972) leaving on Valentine's day. I started with a mission order and end up loving the missions. One of the villages gave me a gold ring! as a souvenir w/ Guyana map. My word of thanks dwell on the relationship between priest and people: "Your priest has no wings or halo. We are human beings. Just like a father coming from working in the farm... his tired worn-out body is energized when wife and family are there to welcome him and wait on him. Imagine if this same father will go home on an empty house... We draw strength from the community we serve. Imagine your "father" traveling from afar braving the rains and the hot sun in the rivers to give service to an empty church without anyone to welcome him? How shall we feel? But when you make an effort to come just like us... we forget the long tiresome trip, we only remember your effort to be here with us." ///// Here is the text message I sent to friends: River ministry -- Bidding farewell not that easy. Turning the next page means leaving the mission, its rivers, its forests, its people and my "better" self. ///// THE BEST OF WHAT WE CAN. Having the tour of all our thirty villages is taking its toll on me. I feel I have to pace myself or I will fall into fatigue. This 47-year old body is not the same as before. I need rest so that I can be of good use. There are still many needs, many deeds, many weeds but time has come to respond to another call. The only consolation anyone can get is that you did your best in the time given to you to make a difference. Just like all the others that came before me did their best. I also believe I became different in the process... ///// 4Feb2008 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/525b9b47ea138f591a6b23d02670b094_477568a5.writeback Fri, 28 Dec 2007 15:20:37 -0600 SMALL GOD. Pope Benedict said that God decided to come as a small baby to fit in a manger because He is infinitely immense for us to grasp and understand. A baby is someone who needs help, care and love. And that is what I believe is still what the world needs and what we can give. But most people wanted to be big. That is why they cannot understand "small" people and "small" people cannot understand them. The possibility of help, care and love becomes small. The shepherds and the magi were able to see the "big" in the small child. "Big" Herod and the whole of Judea didn't, even they know what the Scriptures say. ///// Someone commented that the MC Sisters are not known to be intellectuals. I said, that is why they can do without much intellectual protest service to the poor. Intellectual pride prevents us from doing the "small things" because we think we are big. We don't want to do house chores, dirty our hands, ride public transportations, and eat in the sidewalk. We don't want cheap ordinary clothes and gadgets. We miss our small God in these big opportunities. We get big heads and small hearts. Small babies and mangers don't matter, only big egos and bank accounts. ///// WORD MADE FLESH. If God is love, He could not remain as Word only. Necessarily He has to be tangible and actual. That is why God lived among us. Jesus did not only talk about love but lived it. That is why He could tell us: love one another as I have loved you. Love then has to shown not only to be talked about. I am always amused with our chickens. There are good and bad hens. A good hen will break the food thrown to them so that the chicks can eat well. She scratches the ground and calls on her chicks to feed first. She will even build a perimeter and protect the food of her chicks from others. A bad hen will just eat by herself not minding if her chicks will eat or not. She doesn't mind if others beat her chicks to take the food from them. A bad hen will be the first to run and abandon her chicks when the chicken hawk attacks the herd. A good hen will safeguard her young and even fight for them. Our best hen died defending her chicks against the chicken hawk. ///// If you have the chance to purchase or borrow the DVD "The March of the Penguins," I guarantee that you will be amazed how Emperor Penguins take care of their young to preserve their species. They are better than us: "walking" 70 miles to the nesting ground in the chilling Antartica, and not eating for four months all for the sake of their young. The female and male Penguin take turns making sacrifices for their young. This is love, shown not only told. Christmas invites us again and again to make actual and tangible the words of our faith. Priest, parent, child, Christmas remain only words, they need to be en-fleshed! Francis of Assisi has this to say, "Preach the Gospel at all times, and sometimes, use words!" See? Preaching is about the preacher himself and his actions. Words may help, sometimes. //// LIGHT INTO OUR DARKNESS. "Let there be light!" are the first words in Creation. "The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone." (Is 9:1ff from Midnight mass 1st reading) "I am the Light of the world," says Jesus. And he adds, "Your light must shine before people that they may see your goodness and give glory to the Father in heaven." There was a time that I wanted to stop making these blogs. I was thinking about just keeping to myself this journey. A friend even asked me politely if the blogs don't brag about myself. I still continue to do so because of the encouragement of many. Actually, the blogs are my way of sharing the breaking of the Light into my darkness. The mission is my Christmas. I read somewhere that darkness in our lives happen more of our own choosing. We experience darkness because we turn off the Light. It is of our own making. Unmaking it will also be our choice. ///// I don't know why I was sad this Christmas. Homesick? Maybe. I celebrated Christmas alone because Jimla slept over in Mabaruma. After the midnight mass, I went to the Presbytery, reheat some food, ate alone, watch a movie, and slept at 2am with nobody to share Christmas with. I just thought of the many who celebrated Christmas the same way I did. And I am okay again... ///// 28Dec2007 Holy Innocents; FRJimla's 11thyr http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/e17d5c4922ae6e1e8e5c2e2c3809d6a5_476284ea.writeback Fri, 14 Dec 2007 07:28:10 -0600 Bamboo landing has been asking us to visit them for a while now. I saw an opportunity and I asked one of our PLA's to accompany me. We went to C- Kumaka and parked the car. We asked Charles to guide us. We started the trek around 11:30am. The first hour of walk was on plain sandy tractor road. Surrounding us are Palm Trees. The second hour was inside the forest through a rough trail. I asked for 2 breaks to drink and eat biscuits. I walked longer than this trek but the pace of the two were fast for me. I also don't have a regular exercise, that's why. ////// Finally we arrived in the village around 2pm. The first house belongs to Halford (whom I met in the market the day earlier but he was intoxicated). I reminded him about what happened in our encounter. He just smiled, scratching his head. The second house belong to the "Father of the Clan," Charlie Williams. There were a total of 6 households in the area, all family to Charlie. There were around 30 little ones who play around the house, or were with their mothers. The houses have no walls and were open to the elements. I notice the bulging bellies of children. Melinda, Charlie's wife, working at the back on the cassava, went to the house to pay her respects. In no time all the others were there. I asked them if they want to celebrate mass in the afternoon or in the morrow. They decided to have it around 4pm. They offered us wild meat pepper pot for lunch. ///// I set my tent up and had rest in one of the vacant houses. The walk sent me to sleep at once. Then at 4pm, everyone gathered in Charlie's house for the mass. I can only hear Uncle Mike's (PLA) responses in the mass. I believe it is only Charlie who can read and write. And because they are very far from the schools, no single child knows how to read or write or pray for that matter. We held hands in the Lord's Prayer but I observed no one is following me as I pray. No one took communion except Uncle Mike. No one was yet married in the clan. //// After mass, we had picture taking and they love to pose for pictures. I took pictures of the birds and the monkey that seem to be part of the family. They offered tea and baked for dinner. We learned that they settled here for over 40 years now. There live on cassava bread and fish they catch in the nearby creek. They sell some of their cassava in the nearby village. No priest had ever set foot on Bamboo landing. They go to C- Kumaka or Whitewater for baptisms. I baptized two babies in the mass. Now Charlie and Melinda want to be married. I told them that it would be better if all the others will be married on the same day with them. I suggested that we will come back and stay for a week. That time it will be a mission team: priest, catechists, ME couple. They were very excited by the idea. //// Darkness fell. We retired around 7pm. I used the other clothes I have as pillow and cushion. We prayed the rosary while lying down. The floor boards become very cold in the night. I have to turn many times to beat the cold, alternately sleeping on my side or on my back. I didn't bring the sleeping bag because it will be additional weight. I survived the rainy night. That was a long night. It was still dark in the forest at 7am. That was 12 hours! Breakfast was served in Charlie's house. After the fish pepper pot meal, they requested pictures of children with the monkey. I obliged. I also asked if I can have my own picture with the monkey. Then we had a group picture again and off we go. The trip back was easier and faster, maybe because we became familiar with the trek by now. My feet hurt and the razor grass scratched my hand. But all went well. ///// Back to Hosororo I still wonder why they chose to settle in so remote a place. Maybe they found "peace and prosperity" there compared to where they were. No complains. In fact when I left to them our sardines and sausages, Melinda in return, gave me 2 small bags of flour and noodles. Poverty, I learned is relative. If we are to use our standards, Bamboo landing will be destitute. But for them they're okay. Maybe they are richer in many ways than us. Their resilience is amazing! Halford told us that he was up at 3am to catch fish for breakfast. Fresh fish is just nearby. The music of the forest lifts the spirit up as you hear different birds singing. We are no better people than they are because we can read and write (maybe it is the reverse). Their children are contented with playing "wooden marbles" from forest fruit trees, naked or half- naked. They run to the creek to bathe and wash their own clothes anytime they wish. They talk to the birds and the monkey. Their smiles and laughter brighten the place. The peace and tranquility in the surroundings gives you a well- earned rest. Poverty, after all, is not about what you do not possess, it is something about who you are. It is not about the "haves and have- nots." It is more about being not about having (or not having). //// I think I have partly answered my own question, why they chose to live in such remote a place... With all these abundance in Bamboo landing, we end up being destitute... They are rich and we are poor. ////// EdBe, 14Dec07:John of the Cross http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/cb49a87e3d915f1e47eda21377a2f6bc_4737831a.writeback Sun, 11 Nov 2007 16:32:58 -0600 PATOK: "Kumatok ka at ikaw ay bubuksan..." Sa misyon, magbukas ka at maraming kakatok... Pagbubuksan mo ba? Nalalapit na ang pagtatapos ng yugtong ito ng ating paglalakbay. Malinaw sa akin na hindi lang ako ang nag-misyon kasi sinamahan n'yo naman ako sa tatlong taon ko sa Guyana. Biruin n'yo yun, nakatagal ako (ay, sila pala!). Patok ang misyon kasi nabulabog muli ang aking idealismo. Habang tumatagal ka sa anumang piniling kalalagyan, magkakaroon ka na doon ng kasanayan. Sanay at nahirati ka na sa mga nakagawian at ayaw mo na minsan ng pagbabago. Parang ang lahat ay maayos na, kontrolado, plantsado. 'Ika nga, mayroon ka ng kumot- pangkaligtasan. Gusto mo na lang manatili sa iyong "kubong-ligtas." Aalisin ang kumot at papalitan ang kubo ng misyon, kaya't kakailanganin mo talaga yung tunay na Tagapagligtas. At sa totoo lang, literal na wala kang kontrol at plantsa dito (wala ngang kuryente eh!) Madarama mo muli na Siya ang may kontrol at nagpa-plantsa na maraming bagay. Di ikaw. Yun ang patok! ///// TOPAK: Di naman talaga kailangang sira ang ulo mo para maging misyonero. Konti lang. Kasi nga pwede namang hindi, bakit ba naisipan ko ito? Tatlong taon na yang tanong na yan sa akin ng marami, May sagot na ba ako? Meron na. Pwede sigurong sabihin, tinopak ako. Marahil kailangang merong dapat isuko, di lang sa mga nakasanayan, kundi pati na rin ang angking karunungan para magbigay daan sa "katopakan" ng misyon. Kasi nga wala ka namang kita (pero marami kang makikita sa sarili, pagkapari, simbahan at Diyos); malayo sa mga mahal sa buhay (pero mas dama mong mahal ka); mahirap (pero masaya). Kung kalokohan ang misyon, may kinalolokohan talaga ang mga misyonero! Sadyang di kayang ipaliwanag nang lubos kung ano nga ba ang narito, pero saksi akong nagpapatunay na maganda at maligaya sa misyon. Kaiba talaga! At maiiba ka rin depende sa pagbubukas mo sa mga kumakatok. (Wag lang ikaw ang kumatok tulad sa makina, ha?!) ///// POTAK (putak): Hindi ito tungkol sa mga manok na alaga ko pero pwede ring isali sila. Pagkatapos nilang mangitlog, abot ang putak nila. Maiingay sila, na para bagang ipinababatid sa lahat na nangitlog na sila. Ang misyon ay hindi na isang salita na lumulutang sa alapaap ngayon. Hindi na ito isang balangkas lamang. Pero mananatili itong salita/putak (o "kalembang na hungkag") kung hindi ito magsasa katawang-tao. Nagkataon, isa ako sa di karapat-dapat na maging misyonero, Dapat tumuloy ang misyon na pumutak para mabatid ito ng madla. Sana naman di lang itlog ang dala ko pauwi. Nawa di lang ingay, sana. Ang blogs ang nakasulat na pagputak sa mga nangyayari sa misyon. Sa katunayan isa rin itong paraan para lagi kong maala-ala ang salamangka ng misyon. Alam kong mahikli ang memorya ng tao. Umaaamin na rin ako sa pagiging malilimutin (di pa naman ulyanin) ///// TAPOK: Mas matindi ang dagok kesa sa tapok. Pwede kang malugmok sa dagok, sa tapok ulo lang ang tama o batok kaya. Ang dami kong tapok na inabot sa misyon. Mga panggising na mga paala-ala. Magbibigay ako ng tatlo. Una, payapa ang pakiramdam pag alam mo na ang Diyos ang bahala. Yung bang sagot ka Niya. Na di mo naman talaga alam lahat ang sagot. Pangalawa, sa parokya na may 10,000 mananampalataya kasama ang pari, ang tatlong magagawa ng pari na di magagawa ng 9,999 na mga katoliko sa parokya ay magmisa, magpa- kumpisal, magpahid ng santo oleo. Hindi dapat ipagkait ang panahon sa mga ito kasi ikaw lang ang makakagawa noon. Pangatlo, malayo na ang naabot at aabutin pa ng pananampalatayang Pinoy. Nakakaaliw na isipin na dala-dala natin kahit saan tayo pumunta ang ating pananampalataya. Ipinagmamalaki kong lagi kung paano tayo sumamba at magpahalaga sa Diyos. At talagang epektib tayo kasi apektib tayo (effective 'coz affective). ///// Kahit ang mga pari at obispo pati mga parokyano ay nagugustuhan ang ating personal approach. Natutuwa sila na ang Pilipinong misyonero ay mahusay pumutak (magpahayag); na may konti o malaking topak (mapagbiro); handang manapok o tumanggap nito (may tapang); at higit sa lahat... patok siya sa takilya (artistahin baga!) ///// Huwag ka nang umangal o kumontra! Kasama yan sa tapang namin...as in tapang ng apog! Mabuhay! ///// 11Nov2007 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/f83920ddb954f8037a2eb54abbfe48b2_471dfcff.writeback Tue, 23 Oct 2007 08:54:07 -0500 The LOSTS. The three parables (24OrdTm) all ended in celebrations. I am asking myself why I am not comfortable with expensive parties, particularly hosted by religious and priests. I will be in attendance, yes, but inside I begin to question why does it have to be luxurious? Why all the lights have to be bright, the music loud and the dress proper? Whatever happened to "invite the blind, the lame... in your feast?" Why do we have special "reserved" seats in the Church for sponsors and politicians in our liturgies? Am I a kill joy? Have I lost it? Maybe I just want us to be discreet. Of course, life is to be celebrated. Pompously? Not necessarily. Meaningfully? By all means. Calling your friends and neighbors because you have found what was lost is good. But including the lost (so that they will also be found) in your guest list is a novelty. ///// Angela, on her debut, invited her friends to spend the whole day with the orphans. She could have done it wearing expensive dress with eighteen roses and candles from well-wishers. The traditional Christmas exchange gifts (among us) of the Cabanatuan Clergy have evolved into a reach-out cash gift to charitable institutions (for others). The "dramatic" person I am, I looked for the 19 "lost" on my 19th year in the priesthood. I asked my friends that instead of giving me gifts, give me money for the needy. I visited 10 charity ward patients with the Social Action staff. They don't know us, we don't know them. After spending sometime, we gave them our presents. The remaining 9 was more exciting...With the help of contacts, I treated 9 sex-workers for lunch. I borrowed a fancy SUV and with my 9 dates went to a nice restaurant. After the meal, I gave them some presents. When they started asking why I was doing this to them, I told them I won the lottery. All these celebrations included the lost... and finding them. In all these, I found something of myself, my priesthood and my God. It was indeed a celebration! ///// ALL FOR THE MONEY. (25/26OrdTm) Money can make you happy or sad. Or you can make others happy or sad with your money. Many among us children share in the expenses of our parents when we have jobs of our own. Many among us also will also turn them down when they ask for more. We line up our own expenses and needs to avoid giving more. How many parents will just be silent (but hurting inside!) knowing that we can share more but decline to help, because of the money? How can we do that to our parents who literally begged from people so that we could finish our school? They will borrow money from neighbors so that we could buy the things needed for our projects. And this is how we return the favor to them... We cause them pain and sadness, yes, just because of the money. ///// When Ate Baby V. was bedridden with stage four cancer, I paid her a visit. She was there vomiting, thin, pale and in pain. I remembered how she also helped me when I was in the seminary. We prayed together and gave her the last sacraments. While I was praying, I told myself that whatever I have in my wallet, I will give her. I went to the bathroom to check my money. To my surprise, I have over Php5,000 (US$100+). I don't carry much money, and I don't count them often. I know I also needed that money, but I have made the pledge already! I felt I didn't want to let go of it all when I was handing it over it to the eldest daughter... "Buy your Mom the pain-reliever she needs..." (Maybe I needed the pain-reliever, myself because of the sum!) I felt the gratefulness in Ate Baby's daughter. But in truth, I also felt overjoyed, I was able to let go of it all. I felt a certain triumph, a sense of victory over myself. I was happy... because of the money. ///// FANNING THE FLAME (27OrdTm 2nd reading). "I am reminding you to fan into a flame the gift that God gave you when I laid my hands on you. God's gift was not a spirit of timidity, but the Spirit of power, and love, and self-control" 2Tim1:6- 8.We received the fire/flame, we have it already. But we have to remind ourselves that we have to FAN it, to keep it burning. The image that comes to my head are the many little bar-be-que stalls in the Philippines.. or the bibingka (rice cake) stalls in December. (talagang pauwi na ako... hehehhe). If you want these good, you have to fan the flame! Paul tells Timothy that he cannot take the faith for granted. He needs to believe it, live it and teach it! It is very clear that a timid Christian has lost the fire... A coward Christian has no flame in him. So is true with Love. Couples must fan the flame or they become cold to each other. As the song says... "Keep the fire burning, kindle it with care..." Magparikit ka ng apoy! Pabagahin mo ang siga!///// 22Oct07 (Impong Gelang) http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/4fb50badc52a75a0c930027ad655474a_47140360.writeback Mon, 15 Oct 2007 19:18:40 -0500 CORRESPONDENCES. Dear Bishop Ronnie, I want to remind you of our last sharing when I was home. This is my final year in the Guyana missions. MSP is now considering mission movements here because Jimla will be alone covering 30 villages, if I will be pulled out. I told the Father Moderator (Superior), that If I will be allowed to extend for another three years, I prefer another place of mission for richer and more varied experience. Certainly the missions helped me a lot in my priesthood. When Fr. Elmer asked me jokingly if I want Gapan as my next parish, I told him, "Parang wala naman akong natutunan sa misyon kung mamimili ako ng parish... Yung pinaka-mahirap nating parokya sa Cabanatuan ang pinaka-mayaman na sa misyon." That is not only talking on the financial side but also on the geographical, cultural, physical and emotional considerations. ///// That is why I wanted to know also this early if you will allow me to go on. I will have to prepare myself towards the new assignment in MSP missions or in our Diocese. This way the MSP and Your Excellency can begin considering where I should be. Fr. Elmer told me that you will have the reshuffle come June 2008, a month earlier to complete my term in the missions. I also need psychological preparation for my next assignment, whatever, wherever it will be. If you will check my files "THE BEST TEN YEARS OF MY PRODUCTIVE LIFE" (I believe, I gave you a copy), the next segment in my wish list is a BEC quasi-parish. That is, if this is still the thrust of the Diocese. Social Action is still in my heart. I learned to love teaching philosophy on a part- time basis. All these come to mind if I will be serving the Diocese next year. ///// But for now, I and the MSP have to know if I will be with them the next three years. They will also need to arrange documents to the next mission area and look at possibilities or mission movements. For myself, I am totally at your disposal. As I have told you, I wish to continue for another MSP term but If Your Excellency wish me to serve in our Diocese, so be it. ///// Dear Fr. Edwin, Peace! I'm happy to know that your experience in the foreign mission has become instrumental in your gaining profound insights into the essence of ministry and service in the Church. I'm sure these will forever be part of your inner resources as you generously and unselfishly dispose of yourself to whatever needs or demands that our local church may ask of you. As regards your question about the forthcoming reshuffling, I wish to inform you beforehand that you shall be included in this pastoral plan which shall take effect sometime towards the end of May. I shall communicate this to the General Superior Mission Society of the Philippines. Shalom! +S. Bancud, sss ///// Dear Bishop, Mabuhay! Salamat po sa email. Salamat din po sa pagtitiwala sa buhay misyonero sa tatlong taon! Mixed feelings po talaga na uuwi na ako sa Diocese. Masaya kasi no place like home naman.. malungkot, kasi enriching ang missions. Magsasabi na po ako dito sa Guyana tungkol sa pag uwi ko. Ganundin po sa MSP. Dadaan po ako sa mga kapatid ko sa US bago Pinas. Pakisabi po sa next email n'yo kung ano ang patay na guhit (deadline) ng pag uwi ko para po makuha ko ang murang flight. I-adjust ko po schedule ayon sa deadline. Actually po July 4, 2008 ang talagang 3 years ko. Pero wala naman po sigurong problema kung maaga ng 2 buwan. Kung meron na rin po kayong iniisip na contribution ko sa Diocese, pakisabi na rin po para nakahanda na kalooban. Ayos lang naman po kung anuman. Salamat po. -Fr Edwin, MSP as in Malapit Sa Paguwi ///// FINISHED OR NOT FINISHED, PASS YOUR PAPER! Time flies so fast. Three years is done. Much as I have loved the missions, I am still a diocesan priest. The MSP Associate Program, in fact, is about that. The "Associate" after being sent away to the missions is sent back to his Diocese to continue his "mission" there. I am presently in the process of gathering what I will carry back. More precisely, who I will carry back? The "who" involves myself and the God I discovered in the missions. At the onset, I can say that the three years made a lot of difference. Mission Sunday 2007 has this account of a former associate that describes my feelings... Father Jimmy joyfully wrote: "I definitely had a diocesan mandate. This was not just a private and individual affair. It was our local church in mission, and I felt proud of my local church for being open, generous, daring, and thankful. "I was very conscious of the need to get into the process of leaving behind the familiar and significant persons, places and things... This was part of the 'taking off of one's sandals' when meeting a new culture... Leave-taking is always difficult for me... I had to let go. "On the whole, my arrival in the Solomon Islands brought back some of my old youthfulness. It was like being a new priest all over again, and I liked the feeling." 15Oct07 (Dad's Bday) http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/764155bb45c67cb25ccdb4d943fcb06b_46dd5620.writeback Tue, 04 Sep 2007 07:57:04 -0500 APPARECIDA: From what I have gathered, the patroness of Brazil was literally fished out from the sea (part by part) by three fishermen who were tasked to provide fish for a noble visitor. Just like the disciples, they caught nothing all night long. But when they prayed to this little image of the Blessed Virgin (1foot), they caught so many that their nets were at a breaking point. Pope Benedict XVI visited this National Shrine last year. There was the old cathedral and this new one. We were allowed to introduce ourselves to a packed congregation before the mass begun. I was hoping that after mass there will be a Filipino or a Guyanese who will approach me, but no one did. It is a very modern and huge cathedral with the altar at the center. The sound system was magnificent and TV monitors were all around the church. ///// RIO de JANIERO. A member of the staff contacted Cristiano, a Rio tour guide to assist Janice and me. His fee is US$175 for 10 hours. We split the cost. He picked us in the bus station at around 9am and we went to Sugar Loaf. The cable car ride reminds me of Lake Tahoe. But the Rio view is more breathtaking than Tahoe. We took pictures but we can't stay long so we took the next cable back. Next is Christ, the Redeemer giant image. Cris took us uphill and a mini bus took us more up to the site. Though a giant, you can still feel Jesus' gentleness, though a hard rock... he looks meek. He extends his hands far and wide to embrace Rio... in all its beauty and profanity. Then we went to Copa Cabana and Ipamena... I was trying to sing the songs in honor of such places but the lyrics escaped my memory. We ate pizza by the beach. People were walking, jogging, playing ball but no swimmers. It was winter and the wind was chilly in the afternoon. The train and all museums were closed because of a strike. We went to the city and ate dinner. We board the 10pm bus and reached Sao Paolo at 4am. ///// SAO PAOLO. My plan was to do a repeat of Rio in Sao Paolo. After accompanying Janice to the Staff's hotel, I began my adventure. I showed the receptionist the address of Fr. Anthony and he said I could walk towards the Metro train. People were very helpful and I reached the Church by 7am. But it was a wrong Church! There were two Churches of the same name in opposite directions. People showed directions again by bus, this time. After many transfers, I finally arrived in the correct Church at 10am. Fr. Anthony was not there! A sister told me he had masses outside. I was asked to wait inside the Church. It was the feast of their patron, St. Jude Thaddeus. After attending 3 masses all in Portuguese, I was telling myself -- Sao Paolo tour is gone. By 1pm, Anthony arrived. We had lunch (thank God!) and I was able to take a shower in his apartment. I wanted to stay to sleep but we had to go back to the Church. I surfed on the net. By 7pm, I concelebrated a charismatic mass with Anthony. People sung, clapped, and danced. It was a very spirited mass, but in Portuguese. Maybe that was my Sao Paolo tour -- an experience that in this corner of the world, faith is alive and well. I shared my impressions in English. We went home to sleep to wake at 4am for my 9am flight. ///// BRASILIA (Brazil's capital). By 12:00 noon, Leo (property custodian) picked me up at the Brasilia terminal. We went to the embassy to have lunch and meet the Ambassador. I was able to rest in one of the receiving rooms. Leo was alone in his apartment because his wife and 2 kids are in Illinois. The elder one was diagnosed with leukemia and needs a bone marrow donor. He is close with the SVD missionaries of Africa, his former post. We recited the daily rosary together complete with litany. We made an arrangement that he will just drop me to a place before his work and pick me up after. I just stayed in the mall and at the embassy for the first 2 days. We also toured Brasilia by night. Saturday, we went to Peneapolis (an old mining town) with the ambassador. We also went to the Franciscan monastery headed by Filipino priests and brothers. Sunday, we attended mass and proceeded to the despedida of Alvin (embassy finance officer). I met other Filipinas married to Brasilieros. I enjoyed my stay in Brasilia because of Leo's company. He is one good guy, someone you can depend on when in Brasilia. ///// BOAVISTA. The plane arrived in Boavista by 2am. It was too early to go to the Bishop so I decided to wait for 6am and did this blog to while the time. I was sleepy but Brazil's memories kept me awake. I asked a ride from a couple because there was no taxi in sight. I begged that they bring me to the Bishop's residence. They did. I waited for 30mins till the Church cleaner arrived. He gave new directions. After walking a mile, I found the residence closed: that's another 30mins of waiting. This is not patience, only survival. I have no place to go and I don't want to stay in a hotel for 5hrs and pay the whole day's rate. Finally, Fr. Edison opened the gate. I had a room and breakfast and shower. I took a nap afterwards Fr. Edison took me with him to do some errands. I was so concerned about the time, only to be told that they are an hour late in Boavista! Hahaha. I realized how God is so great and he created many great people too! I am just humbled on how He works in very unique ways so that His kingdom may come... from Fr. Gruner to Leo, from you to me. Mabuhay ang Diyos!!! 3Sept2007 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/08bb7c93b7e3770119153ee53edaf558_46d9de7b.writeback Sat, 01 Sep 2007 16:49:47 -0500 ON EQUAL FOOTING. My partner Jimla decided to go all natural in his intake. He has coffee without caffeine, milk which is soya, oil that is virgin, ampalaya juice, kulitis juice and what have you... He has reason to do so after the results of his last check-up. I shared with him the conversation I had with Fr. Elmer. Noticing I got lechon on my plate with all its glorious fat and "balat" he commented, "Edwin, that is full of cholesterol!" Jokingly I replied, "you know my friend, I guess we will die being run-over by a car and not because of this cholesterol. And poor we, we deny ourselves of this tasty-finger-lickin'-good- cholesterol-full lechon!" I appreciate the concern of Elmer and everybody. I also know and choose my food intake (that is, if there are alternatives). But "eat, what the people have prepared for you..." People live and die. Many don't have a choice of what to eat and some don't have something to eat yet they live longer. Few have a choice of what to eat and go vegetarian and all natural yet they die early. We are on equal footing: "the Lord has given, the Lord has taken away." ///// YELLOW FEVER. I thought I will not make it for Brazil. Two people reminded me about the requirement for a yellow vaccine card to enter Brazil. I accomplished as was told. When I was checking in for my flight, they denied me to board. They require for an international yellow vaccine from Georgetown's Ministry of Health. I have a local vaccine card from Northwest District. I have an hour more before gate closes. I asked the help of friends and asked for a fax machine so that I can send the copy of the local vaccine card to prove that I have it already. After many calls and pleadings, I was allowed to check-in for the flight was delayed for 2 hours! That was one delayed flight that I was very thankful for! God's hand was there.///// THE FLIGHTS. From Georgetown, we arrived in Boavista around 4pm but the connecting flight will to only be at 11pm. I decided to go with 3 UNICEF staff and one Amerindian chief to a hotel nearby. It was good that the Amerindian chief knows Portuguese. No one speaks English. (Babel really made a lot of mess...) We split the hotel and taxi fares. We had a good rest and dinner. The flight to Sao Paolo arrived before 8am. It was good that Fatima Conference staff were there to welcome me. But we have to wait for other delegates as their flights will arrive after mine. We started to travel to Botucatu (278kms away). Finally we arrived in Hotel Primar when it was dark. Whew! Dinner was served at 8pm, exactly 24 hours when I had my last solid food.///// THE CONFERENCE. All the conferences are uploaded in www.fatimaondemand.org/en where you can listen to when still available. Priests from Latin America were many, also from Brazil. Except the Fatima Staff, were only 4 priests who speak English. I dig my Parla Italianao and Habla Espanol to communicate. I want to believe that they understood (bahala sila). The Conference revolved around the message of Fatima: Reparation for sin and Consecration to the Immaculate Heart of Mary. For sometime, even the Church forgot about this. Russia must be consecrated separately so that Peace in the World will be achieved (as was revealed in this public prophetic apparition of 1917). There were many relevant information that was shared. We have 7 talks everyday, sumptuous food, nice hotel. The challenge left for us was to share the message AGAIN! Somehow the Church as it were relaxed and the message fainted.///// THE MISSION'S GIFT. Never have I imagined I will be in Brazil in my life. The invitation was sent to the former Jesuit priest assigned in Hosororo who passed away in 2005. Jimla and I expressed our interest to attend since it is an all expense- paid conference. Jimla backed out after realizing that he accepted weddings and youth missionaries from Trinidad on those days. A traveler that I am, I asked for another week extension in Brazil so that I could see places. The conference had a scheduled pilgrimage in Apparecida (National Patroness of Brazil). We started traveling from Botucatu to Sao Paolo to Apparecida. We were able to concelebrate with the Sunday Mass in the magnificent Shrine. Morning after, I learned that Janice, one of the Conference staff, is going to Rio de Janeiro (3hrs away). I decided to pack my things and go. ///// On the way, Bruce Almighty with Jim Carey was being shown in Portuguese. I was reflecting on how God has blessed me all along with this Brazil trip. I realized how little and insignificant I am as I experienced for myself all the priests (150 plus) doing their ministry in the Americas. I developed a special bond with two Mexican old priests. One is 56 years a priest and still active. How little my contribution is to the Kingdom which is so vast! And the trip to Rio... only in the movies I've seen such places. I believe I have to make another blog for my Brazil sojourn: Rio de Janeiro, Sao Paolo, Brasilia. Please visit the new pics of the Only Way to Peace Conference at the extension website. Mabuhay! 31Aug2007 http://www.edbesaguyana.zoomshare.com/1.shtml/72214d791a167136cd425cccf3f15c4b_469e089e.writeback Wed, 18 Jul 2007 07:33:34 -0500 INSANG NOEL. When I arrived in Guyana, Noel and Riza were the first Filipinos I met. They were from the VSO (Volunteer Service Overseas). Riza finished her contract, Noel did not. He opted to work as an optometrist in Georgetown (his former job in the Philippines). He was nearly deported back to the Philippines because of his expired visa. But he really wanted to stay to support his family back home. He found a benevolent employer who took him in. He was able to double the income of the Eye clinic in two years. They even opened two new branches outside Georgetown with Dr. Noel as the lone optometrist. All was well.//// Among Filipinos in Guyana, Noel is the Karaoke King. He cracks every joke he can remember in our gatherings. He plays the guitar and did a short stint in one of the bars in Georgetown. He is the life of the party, a never-a-dull-moment guy. Then, in one of the many Filipino gatherings, he collapsed.//// Filipinos gather around Noel from that time on. They contributed some money for Noel's hospitalization. They took turns visiting him in the hospital. Noel survived the first stroke. He went home to one of the Filipino homes to recuperate. He complained of a severe headache and was operated on. He didn't survive this time. Again, Filipinos gathered around Noel in his wake, funeral, and cremation. Yes, up to sending his ashes home. In those shining moments of unity, sympathy, and extended family -- I just felt glad, Pilipino ako! Why Insang Noel? Though we were not related, my middle name and his surname happened to be Sanchez. Visit www.fotki.com/drnoel for pictures.///// CRITICAL THRESHOLD. There comes in the whole process of Evolution when one remains an ape or become a homo sapiens. All species pass through this upper limit (critical threshold). We find ourselves many times on the verge of becoming more human or choose to be an ape. It is amusing to find that Charles Darwin called this - Natural selection. Darwin said that this acted on variations within species, so that some variants survived and reproduced, and others perished. In this way, new species slowly evolved even as others continued to exist. In the missions, I find myself becoming more human and at times choosing to be an ape. The choices I make determine who I can become. I select who I can be, naturally. Yes, I continue to exist but do I evolve to be more human or less human (ape). ///// A priest-friend of mine shared his views about the difficulty of having a simple lifestyle among priests. He said that from the seminary and more so in priestly life, this is not so. He also invited me to prepare for my retirement by looking for "greener" missions after Guyana. He pitied some of our retired priests who are presently having a hard life. The Diocesan Social Security is not yet in place. I agreed with him at some point. But I also offered some piece of my mind and heart. ///// I still believe (just like my priest-friend) that God is our security ultimately. He will not abandon his priests. And I also know that friends and family abound. I trust in God's goodness and the kindness of His people. If Insang Noel received so much love and concern, Fr. Edwin will, too! Though it maybe difficult to have a simple lifestyle, you can still "select" to be simple in your choices. I shared with a friend last week: why will I spend a sum with a fancy hotel if there is a modest hostel available? Why buy a new signature jeans, when there is a cheap "ukay-ukay" of the same quality? Why go to an expensive restaurant when you can indulge with gusto in a "turo-turo" somewhere? This is my "Natural Selection." ///// Back to Darwin: "Some animals go extinct because they cannot compete with other animals for food. Some animals go extinct because they are killed by enemies. New kinds of animals are always evolving. Evolving means that the animals are changing slowly from generation to generation. Small differences between parents, children, and grandchildren slowly add up over many, many generations. Eventually, a different kind of animal evolves." ///// I told my priest-friend that with difficulty I embrace the challenge of the missions. I told Jimla that in this last stretch of the missions I can say that I still can live a simple life. (Remember "PAGKAHUMALING" first blog). I take this as another upper limit: When church people are caught up in the business of the world, they easily become COUNTERSIGNS of the Kingdom where the POOR are blessed! My priest-friend is in his own Critical Threshold. I hope and pray that a different kind of "priestly" animal evolve in both of us! 16July2007. Our Lady of Mt. Carmel